


Day 2 - Cuddling Somewhere

by casislikepietodean



Series: 30 Day OTP Challenge (Destiel) [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Cuddling, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, M/M, Nightmares, Talking, just a tiny bit of Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-23
Updated: 2015-08-23
Packaged: 2018-04-16 19:27:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4637427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casislikepietodean/pseuds/casislikepietodean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean is awoken by nightmares and Cas startles him by standing right beside his bed when he wakes up. But then, he takes good care of Dean and even gets him to talk about his dreams, and with Castiel's help, Dean can finally fall asleep again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Day 2 - Cuddling Somewhere

**Author's Note:**

> Here's Day 2 of the 30 Day OTP Challenge!  
> I hope you like it :)  
> And again, a big thanks to ohdarlingscira on Tumblr, who helped me with this!

Images flashed in front of Dean's eyes in various, bright, piercing colors. He saw Cas, Sammy, Jo, basically all of the people he‘d ever cared about and had failed. He felt guilt washing over him, avoiding the images though they never let him get away. They pushed and pushed until he couldn't stand it anymore and sat up, screaming, the pillow soaked in sweat as usual, as well as his face and all of his clothes. But this time, he screamed even louder as his eyes adjusted to the darkness and he was able to notice a silhouette standing right beside his bed.

"Shhh... Dean..." he heard a familiar voice say, his brain still needed some time to fully wake up to be able to recognize the voice, but his eyes were faster: It was Castiel.

"Damn it, Cas! Don't ever scare me like that again!" he croaked hoarsely, his heart still pounding like crazy.

"My apologies, Dean," the angel said. Dean gasped and stood up from the bed. He had already prepared some fresh clothes for a situation like this one because it basically happened every night.

"Now excuse me, I need to change."

He went to the bathroom next to his room, changed his clothes and came back, expecting the angel to be gone but he was still there, waiting for him. Cas was just turning on the nightlight when Dean got in.

"What are you doing here anyway, Cas?" he asked, making the question sound much more harsh than he intended it to be. Dean was happy Cas was here.

Cas raised his eyebrows. "I can go, if you wish?"

"No, Cas, I- I'm sorry. I'm happy you're here."

Castiel smiled sweetly and gestured for Dean to get back into bed. The hunter noticed he had changed the sheets while he was in the bathroom.

"Thanks, Cas. But why are you doing this for me?"

The angel raised his eyebrows. "I'm your friend, Dean. That's what friends are for."

Dean nodded and got into bed. The sheets were soft and fresh smelling. Castiel sat down next to him.

"Dean... What were you dreaming about?" Cas asked carefully, tilting his head to the side like he always did.

Dean almost snapped, because he hated it when someone asked him such personal things, but then he remembered it was Cas and he didn't deserve a harsh answer. He tried to pull himself together.

"Look, Cas... " he began. "I don't really wanna bother you with all this stuff..."

"Oh, you don't," the brunet assured. "I'm here to listen."

Dean sighed. He'd never talked about his dreams to anyone, and now Cas was insisting on listening.

"There are worse things than my dreams," he answered, "There's more important stuff to worry about right now."

"Dean... I know how much you are suffering. It doesn't matter if there are worse things or not, _you matter._ And if those dreams are making you suffer then of course it's important."

Dean's heart skipped. He couldn't believe what he had just heard coming from the angel's mouth. 

"You- you think I _matter?_ " he asked insecurely.

Cas smiled reassuringly. "Of course you do. Now, talk to me."

His hand stroked Dean's, and then he was playing with his fingers a bit. It was relaxing when he did this. Dean loved it. He took a few deep breaths and sighed.

"It's so... hard to talk, Cas. I've never done this."

"Then it's about time," Cas insisted.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, I guess..."

"Do you need something, Dean?" the angel asked, concerned.

Dean shook his head. "No, it's perfect."

"Okay."

"Well... The dream I had - the dreams I _have_ every night. It's about... Uh..."

He avoided looking at the other man's face. Suddenly, he wasn't so sure he should really talk about his dreams. Maybe he could make something up to not have to tell Cas he had dreams about him almost every night? But then again, the dreams (today) were about how he had failed him, not about his true feelings for the pretty angel. He took another deep breath and Cas squeezed his hand. With the other hand he grabbed the blanket and put it around them, carefully tucking both in.

"About what?" he asked, trying to get Dean to continue.

"About... People. People I care about. People I love." He looked at Cas and took a deep, shaky breath again. Now or never. "You."

The angel raised his eyebrows. "Why is that bad?" he wondered, but he didn't sound offended. His voice was soft and caring.

"All that I see... Are moments that I've made the wrong choices. I relive how I've let you all down over and over again." His voice cracked in pain. "I can't take it, Cas. Not every freaking night. I hate myself for letting you down. I hate that I couldn't make a different choice back then. All those people, you, Sammy, all of them, they're all perfect, never make mistakes, and then there's me, _horrible_ me who lets down all of his friends. And then I see it all over again and it hurts so freakin' much, Cas. I- I... I _can't._ " A tear rolled down his cheek. Cas' thumb carefully wiped it away.

"Dean, don't worry. We'll fix this. You won't have to dream about such things. Besides, you said we were perfect. We aren't. We make mistakes, too. It's _human._ Even though I'm an angel, I have doubts too. I'm always desperately trying to do the right thing. How many times have _I_ let you down, Dean? We all do it, we all make mistakes. But I think it's about time you find a way to forgive yourself. And if you need help with that, you can find a way to redeem yourself, I find that pretty helpful sometimes. But you can just try to forgive yourself. Just look past it. Things happened in the past, but everyone forgave you. No one is mad. People change, Dean. People forgive. People forget. You learned from your mistakes, you'll never do any of it again. And you certainly don't have to hate yourself for that."

Dean sighed and held the angel's hand firmly. He needed something to hold onto.

"Thanks..." he muttered, a bit embarrassed now, having told him the whole story. He was pretty sure Cas didn't judge him, but there was a reason he'd never talked about any of this to anyone. And that reason was indeed, the fear of being judged.

Cas lay down and Dean was confused—angels didn't sleep, right? He stretched out his arm to the right.

"Come here, Dean."

"What? Where?," he muttered insecurely, although he had an idea where this was going, and his heart skipped at the thought. Cas gestured to Dean's pillow, but there was his arm. Was he... really intending to _cuddle?_ But Dean carefully lay down and noticed the angel was wrapping his arm around him. His heart started pounding like crazy again. He turned to the other man and their faces were not more than two inches apart.

"I'm here, Dean," the angel whispered and Dean could feel his breath on his lips. "You're a precious human being, remember that."

Dean smiled at that sentence. "And you're a precious angel, Cas. Thank you. For everything."

"Shh..." Cas hugged him tight and Dean found himself wrapping his arms around the angel's waist, pulling him even closer to him. Cas smelled fresh - a sweet smell, something like honey, mixed with a scent of what he supposed was ozone and rain. His white flannel was softly brushing against his cheek - he wasn't wearing his trench coat. Dean silently wondered when he'd taken it off.

Cas pulled away and looked at him. "I'll stay with you all night, okay?" he promised.

Dean nodded. "Yes, please."

He was shocked by how needy his voice sounded. It wasn't the man's usual voice, not one of a grown man who fought monsters for a living, not one of a man who desperately tried to drink away his worries. It was the voice of someone who was frightened, and hiding his true self. And that was someone Dean was, too.

"Of course."

He planted a soft kiss on Dean's forehead and hugged him again. Dean hoped that his heart would stay in his chest and not explode or anything. He hoped, too, that Cas wouldn't feel his wild heartbeat through the layers of clothing. Castiel pulled the blanket up and tucked them in once again, since they had moved and the blanket had fallen down on one side. He still had one arm wrapped around Dean as he did so. He turned off the nightlight and whispered, "Now, sleep. I'll watch over you."

Dean moved as close to him as possible, putting his head on the angel's chest. Listening to the steady sound of his heartbeat, feeling safe in his arms, Dean was finally able to fall asleep.


End file.
